Memorial Service for John, Pastor Katie Haney,Ps. 77:1-15, John 14:1-6, 25-27

The lament of the psalmist might very well be our lament. His words, our thoughts: "I am so troubled, I cannot speak... Has God forgotten to be gracious? Has he in anger shut up his compassion?" The tragedy of John 's illness and death and the terrible void it leaves in the lives he touched moves us to rage at God for allowing this terrible thing to happen. Not only are we grieving, but we don't understand. We are angry about our loss and the unfairness of it all. God is a likely object of our anger and disbelief, today as in ancient times. Raging at God is part of the Hebrew tradition - the psalms are full of laments about God's apparent lack of compassion for his suffering people. And yet that ability to rail at God is the sign of a living relationship with God. Grieving is not some taboo emotion beyond the bounds of godly behavior. Even deep despair is an appropriate response to the tearing away of someone we love. The pain of loss is part of our human condition.
  Grief is the natural outcome of loving someone. Because our human lives are finite, we make ourselves vulnerable to sorrow whenever we love. We can't avoid the limitations of human life, any more than we can avoid our need to love others. Loving is a good thing. We love because God first loved us. God created us for relationships and we express the image of God in us when we allow ourselves to love and be loved. God intends for us to grow relationships that are strong and deep, to invest ourselves fully in someone's life. The grief you share today is a sign of the commitments you all made to John to make him a part of your lives. It's evident that he had a wide-reaching impact on you - that he was loved and that he expressed his full humanity in loving and caring you. You are all richer for having John in your lives.
 Relationships like yours with John bring joy to our lives and change us in untold ways, even when our loved one is taken away from us. John lives on in memory, which colors your lives from this point onward. Part of the task of grieving is to make memories from the experiences you shared with him. In the midst of grief, reminiscing is a way of honoring John and his contributions to your lives. It's a way of keeping his memory foremost in your minds.

Continued
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